Nada Al-Ahdal | Back then I was pregnant and still young, and asked my husband to let me have a scan to see if it was a girl or a boy

So, back then I was pregnant and still young. I asked my husband to let me go for a scan to see whether it was a girl or a boy, and he told me he didn't want to know. He said, let's leave it like this, I don't need to know now if it's a girl…
That word kept cutting into me. And so what if it's a girl..
Once, when I was visiting my family, I told my friend, let's go out for a walk..
My mother agreed, on the grounds that it is good for the delivery, and said, be quick, so your husband doesn't call while you're out …
And of course I went to the hospital, Al-Ahli in Hadda city..
And I found out it was a girl..
I came out upset and cried all the way, happy with her and upset at my husband's words…

My friend wanted to cheer me up and said let's buy mutabbaq, she knows I love it, from a shop at the bend, next to the Al-Sarkha shop..
So, she went to buy it and I waited for her a little way off, at the corner..
I saw the street was empty and lifted my face veil because of the suffocation I felt..
A fancy car drove slowly by, and I quickly lowered the veil..
and they started harassing..
I looked around to see who they were talking to..
and he was talking to me.. I was astonished..
I said to him, are you blind, can't you see …!
I meant that I was pregnant and exhausted, in a coat like his grandmother's; I couldn't imagine anyone would harass a pregnant woman..
And he laughed and went on saying even more..
I understood that he was one of those people who love someone to put them down..
Some people like to be told off like that; it's their nature, a sickness..
So I said to myself, then I'll ignore him..
and I walked over close to my friend..
and he stayed where he was, harassing from a distance …
There were few people in the street.. they looked at me and at him and just smiled..
and on top of my distress I grew more distressed at them and at him..
Anyway, we got the mutabbaq and walked a little into a side street to eat it, and he had disappeared, who knows where the jinn had carried him off to…
And suddenly there he was again, driving slowly, slowly beside us in his car…
My friend said to him, brother, by God this is shameful, it's not right..
the woman is pregnant and upset, this isn't proper..
And he said, I'm ready to take her worries away, I'd give my life for the baby..
And he put his hand out of the car wanting to touch my belly, and as a reflex I threw the bag of mutabbaq between his eyes…
Of course, I opened the gates of hell on myself…!
He stopped the car and got out and shoved me so hard I nearly flew..
and my friend was shouting, looking for someone to help us, and the street was empty.. The poor thing went back to apologise to him, especially when she saw he had a pistol..
and she told him, enough, enough brother, we're sorry.. the woman is pregnant, don't hurt her..
And he stamped on my hand on the ground with all his strength, saying, this hand of yours, I'll break it for you, and he pulled off my veil and threw it..
I looked for a stone or anything, and found nothing but dirt to throw at him…
All the words in the world weren't enough for me to say …

Nothing separated us except his friend, who finally got out.. and he was pulling him away and telling him, enough, she knows her mistake, enough,,
and I said, my mistake?! You piece of trash,,!!
He came back and said: and here's another slap, so you know who you're throwing things at..
And off they went..

My friend helped me up, trembling and crying …
I was shaking the dirt off my jilbab, unable to take it in..
I saw my friend was horrified and wanted to make her laugh, so I said to her, see this… you know, they're right not to want girls..
All we get is rolling in the dirt, and if we told them someone hurt us on the street they'd say, nobody told you to go out…
She handed me my veil, all covered in dirt, crying, and her crying wouldn't stop..

We walked a little and I gasped and said, where's the mutabbaq! Let's go back..
She said, walk on, may you lose your appetite, I swear I'll never taste it again in my life, and we laughed, in the state we were in, imitating the voice of the enraged man, like a bull..

We sat thinking whether to tell anyone, and remembered that her brothers would go back to stopping her from going out, and she would get into trouble..
and I barely go out one day a year, and only when I'm at my family's..
and if anyone knew I had gone out of my family's house, that would be another disaster..
So we kept quiet and that was that… and we sat there, crushed by what had happened,
and I felt sad for my friend, because she was crying so bitterly,,

We were young and didn't know what to do..
and we were afraid problems would happen and they would say we were the cause of them..
This incident comes back to me whenever I hear about harassment…
And today I wanted to share it.. maybe it will benefit someone, or inspire someone.. or help someone … and so that you know that it is because of you that we stay silent…
and because of you many girls stay silent…
It doesn't matter how a girl may dress….
nor does it matter what she looks like …
because I deliberately chose a story that I am sure many like me have lived..
When you justify harassment by saying girls must dress modestly and cover up..
you are justifying the harasser's vulgar nature…
you are justifying the harasser's bad upbringing..
because a normal man, a gentleman, if he sees a girl, whatever she is like and whoever she is, the most he might do is smile at her or toss a word from a distance…
but he would never think of following her…
he wouldn't think of approaching her..
or speaking to her with shameful words, or think of touching her…
He has real pride…
not fake, put-on pride like the ignorant one who shows off in his father's car and gets out to shove a pregnant woman and slap her because she threw a bag at him, when the cause is his own actions, behaviour and lack of manhood.. and there are very many specimens of him …
Anyway, I have told the worst experience I have been through in my life.. and its bitterness hurt more than childbirth itself,,????
and I lost the mutabbaq,, ????

A true story from a beautiful friend
@cathren.queen.5

Damn the herd society that incites against women and girls, defends the sicknesses of vile souls, watches these incidents and has no conscience, humanity, values or morals